When the decorations came down, something clicked.
It was a few days after Christmas, I found myself standing outside in the cold, packing up the holiday decorations. My body ached from weeks of stress, and I was still battling migraines that had been plaguing me for over a month. The holidays had been a blur of tasks- decorating inside and out, setting up lights, lawn ornaments, everything. My partner had been sick on top of struggling with the grief of the year anniversary of losing his sister to cancer, he just wasn’t in a space to help, so the weight of making sure the family had a memorable holiday fell entirely on me.
I wanted the holiday to be as special as it could despite all the negatives this time of year can bring. I wanted to create those magical memories that stay with you forever. But by the time I was taking everything down, I was running on empty. Frustrated and alone, I was pulling apart the family of snowmen we had on the lawn, a father, a child, and a mother. The mother snowman was the last of the three I broke down. I was frustrated at first because she was a mess with all the cords and just more for her to break down, it was getting dark and I thought to myself, “Of course, the mom has to be the one carrying it all.” But then I took a breath and I realized something: She had all the power.
Every light, every connection, every bit of power for the entire snowman family ran through her. She was the source of their light, their energy. Without her, the display wouldn’t have worked.
And that’s when it hit me- how much that snowman reflected real life.
As moms, we are the power source for our families. We give out our light and energy to everyone around us, sometimes until we’re completely depleted. We hold it all together, even when we’re barely holding ourselves together. And while it’s beautiful to be the source of so much love and strength, it’s also exhausting and often a thankless job.
That moment with the snowman taught me something important: being the source of light is a gift, but it’s also a responsibility that requires balance. If we’re constantly giving, we have to find ways to recharge. Because without our own energy, the family we’re powering can’t shine as brightly.
So here’s my reminder to myself and to any other moms reading this, don’t forget to take care of your own light. It’s okay to rest, to ask for help, and to find moments of stillness amidst the chaos. Because even Christmas ornaments know: that the family doesn’t work without the mom’s energy.
xo,
Amy
